Redefining Friendships

I'm all into minimalism these days, thanks to Sanat. 

So I've been trying to clean up the mess, and re-organize all the clutter in my life. And there's a lot. It's going to take longer than expected.

Anyway, I was thinking about friends, and how each one is unique, and yet we all share similar bonds. Then I realized that, like so many things in life (most recently, Poetry), we don't have a definition for the word 'Friendship', which is ironic considering how often and loosely we use the term.

Now before I get into it, a small discussion on this habit of defining things. Oscar Wilde says ' to define is to limit'. And I do agree, in that by defining something, we assume we know all there is to know about a subject, which prevents us from learning more. 

But, I find that without definitions, it becomes impossible (or at the least, quite difficult) to document new lessons learnt, or understand any change of opinion. 

In any subject as relative and abstract as friendship or poetry, I find it easier to find the 'ideal state', and define that. So, a less-than-ideal friendship would still be a friendship, just like a badly cooked pasta is still pasta. 

Definition of Ideal Friendship : 
A relationship between two individuals, wherein both can be with each other, and let each other be, with equal harmony.     

Now let me explain.

1. I personally believe an ideal friendship is always one-on-one (i.e between two people), but there's no reason why the definition cannot be applied to groups as well.

2. When I say 'Be', I mean be the person you truly are, without any pretenses or defense mechanisms.

3. I realize the term 'harmony' is open to interpretation, so , for lack of a better definition, I'd describe it as being fully in sync with who you truly are. 

4. Those who don't know who they 'Truly are', can't aim for an ideal friendship; however, if they're lucky to have found one, they can learn a lot about themselves in retrospect.

5. I'm still undecided as to whether romantic relationships can ever be an ideal friendship, because I don't know how it can ever completely fulfill the second criteria of letting each other be. ( It's ironic that I thought of this entire concept during a conversation with Smriti.)